Hey guys! I'm taking a break from writing for a while to work on a video i'm filming. I'll be posting a link on here when i'm done; should be exciting!!!
Apr 5, 2011
Her life was empty; she had been thrown into chaos. She had buried Jaca. She was alone, and she needed advise. She was no longer a child, being around seventeen. Jaca had never been sure of her exact birthday. But she needed advice. Her life with Jaca had been the only one she knew. She decided to travel on to the nearest town, where she knew a friend of Jaca’s lived. He was a stolid, decent sort, and she trusted him to help her. Perhaps he could house her until she could decide what to do about making a living.
Once arriving in the town, she made her way straight to his house. It was open, and it was empty. No sign of anyone living there. It was definitely his house, and he was definitely gone. She sat down on the stoop and tried to think, but her mind wouldn’t comply. She finally remembered that the man had been about to depart on a business venture in a neighboring country the last time she and Jaca had seen him. That was around six months ago.
Briefly she thought about crying, but she was too exhausted. Well, she could look for a job… what skills did she possess? She could read and write. Uncommon for a woman in this country, as it was strongly frowned upon. From her travels with Jaca she knew of the ways and customs of many businesses and people groups near and around the country. Not all of the better off townsmen could read or write. Maybe they would be willing to hire her as a scribe; she could afford to charge less than a man would. And she could barter with the towns-people or villagers around the area if they needed a letter sent to far off friends or family. It seemed a pretty solid idea despite the risk and probably the best she could strike on at the moment. She set out to find a decent looking business.
Eight failed attempts later she was was beyond frustrated. She had discovered that it was not only frowned upon for women to be able to read and write, women could not work except under a man. She had briefly thought about going out to work as a boy, and then quickly discarded the idea. No one would believe that she was a boy. She would have to find a decent merchant to work under. Hopefully one that wouldn’t take most of her earnings. She stopped for a some lunch and then doggedly set out again. Six stops later she on the verge of giving up. Why did the townspeople have to be so stubborn!?! No one seemed to listen to her. They took one look and heard that she could write and just swept her out of their stores. This place was filled with awful people.
Just before dinner she found someone who was willing to let her work under him. He was a merchant who sold a little bit of everything, and his wares appeared to attract those who could afford to pay for quality. He couldn’t read or write and would also have her take over his book-keeping. After establishing the wages and striking a deal, she told him she would be back when the store opened. Not the best situation she could imagine, but at least she would have some money to keep herself living for a while. After she left the shop, she went back to her small camp a ways outside of the town. Being alone with just her thoughts was terrible, but better than being alone in a crowd of strangers. Spending what little money she had on renting a room was out of the question. Besides, she couldn’t stand staying inside the town longer than she absolutely had to. The smells of the town seemed to seek her out and choke her breathing. She couldn’t understand how those people lived in it.
Mar 31, 2011
Ri had known many places and peoples, as she had always traveled with her grandfather. He was not her father’s father, but he might as well have been. He was all that she loved, and her only family as far back as she could remember. He had always called her Ri, and she called him Jaca, because he never seemed to stop talking. He would teach her useful things that kept her alive in the wilderness, such as trapping, three ways to catch fish, hunting with makeshift spears and bows made with sinew from animals, recognizing edible plants in any terrain, making fires with damp wood, cooking, and taking care of injuries. He also taught her to respect and learn from the forest; to be alert and see around her. When they traveled through towns and villages, he would show her the ways of the people there, teach her of cultures, languages, and the learning of the scholars. She soaked up the knowledge like the ground does rain. They never stayed in one place longer than six months, moving on to another exciting place. She never thought to wonder why they didn’t live in a town or village like those she saw; her grandfather was different than the people she saw, why should he act as them? He had told her that she was an orphan, and he had found her alone as a small child. He teased that she had been birthed of the wind, and named her Elyria, meaning breeze. He had never complained of her presence. He was not overly affectionate; but she knew he loved her. These were the best years of her memory.
In one of the villages they stopped at, there was an illness beginning to spread. As soon as Jaca heard wind of it he packed them up and they were traveling again. But not before he managed to catch the sickness. They were a week out from the village before he would admit that he could no longer travel. In fact he could barely stand. Making a temporary camp, she made him rest so he could recover. She had never seen him seriously ill, and this sickness was not familiar to either of them. His strength just seeped from him. When he finally broke into a fever she was a little relieved. At least this she knew how to help with. But whatever she did, the fever rose. He became restless and pale. He wouldn’t eat; couldn’t eat. He worried that she would catch his sickness, but she hadn’t caught it yet, so she really didn’t care. She tried all the remedies she could think of and find the ingredients for. She even made up a few, desperate to find something that helped. But he kept getting worse. Soon he was often times unconscious. Clamping down on her fear she tended to him as best she knew. Late in the night, five days since they stopped traveling, his breath left him. With it went her whole world.
Mar 23, 2011
Mountains. Lots of them. From where she stood on the hilltop, no caves, or even a hint of them, were visible. Only those who knew of the exact location of her cave would be able to find it, and she had never told as soul. For as long as she could remember, this was her safe haven. When in distressed or in trouble or simply tired, she escaped to this place. It was in the wilderness, far from any civilization. She had never seen more than a couple travelers hiking the passes of the mountain range opposite. She would be safe as soon as she reached it, if she could reach it.
Treading as silently and lightly as possible in her bare feet, she tried to walk on the rocks or hard, bare ground to keep from leaving tracks. As soon as she was in foothills, she found a rocky stream and began wading upriver. When that left her path she took a few minutes to bathe the human smell from her, rubbing aromatic plants on her skin and feet to cover her scent in case her pursuers used dogs. She continued on.
Two hours later the woods turned to pines and other evergreens. The forest floor, strewn with a thick needle bed would make hiding her tracks easier. She broke a few new, sappy needles to again rub on her feet to hide her scent. Despite her entrenched and well founded belief that her hunters were ignorant of tracking and woodcraft, she couldn’t manage to shake the terrible and near paralyzing fear of being caught. She felt sympathy for the animals she had seen hunted by predators. Now she knew the dread, the heavy instinct to tear through the woods until her body gave out. But she knew if she wanted to truly be safe, she must be smart, leave them nothing to follow.
Dusk. She had to make a choice. Find a place to sleep for the night and move on in the morning, or press on in the dark and risk leaving a trail or perhaps be hunted by animals as well as men. She had a greater respect for the tracking skills of a mountain lion or bear than she did for the party she was trying to lose. Her stomach made up her mind for her. Piñón trees were scattered throughout the forest at this height in the mountains, and if she searched she could find one not too far out of her way. The nuts were plentiful and edible, if not filling. Berries would be out of the question at this time of year, and she didn’t have several days to set traps. Nuts it would be. Once she had found and eaten enough to settle her stomach, she disguised her work as the work of squirrels and birds. She then spent the last shred of light searching for a large, sturdy tree with a thick tangle of branches. Before climbing up she grabbed some fallen branches to make a nest for herself so as to not fall out of the tree and break her neck in the night. With one last look and listen, she quieted herself to sleep.
Mar 16, 2011
Hey wonderful people! I just hit One Hundred pageviews on my blog today! EEEEEEEEPP!!! So very excited. Funny thing tho... the only comment I've gotten has been from my brother, and I told him to comment. chuckle. And feedback was kind of the original point of this blog. haha. oh well.
I've gotten views now from lots of countries. of course, I've gotten the most from the woderfully entertainment obsessed U.S. But I've also gotten views from the UK, Canada, Russia, India, Japan (God help them to recover the people who are lost and bless them for being so honorable in this terrible time of chaos and terror), Hungary, Philippines, and Malaysia! thanks for viewing and please keep it up. -Jacqui
Mar 5, 2011
I want freedom. Freedom for myself and my sister. I wish there was no such thing as “the system,” there to determine we are unable to care for ourselves. I’m as capable as any middle-aged man in taking care of myself and my family. Probably more so than many. I mean, how many can say that they can control fire and wind with their minds? Not many. None, in fact. I can make anything, even rock, burst into flames just by picturing it. I can sense heat of any kind, like a sixth sense. It started as just the fire bending, but now I can control the flow of wind around me, the same way I do fire. I imagine the small atoms in the air beginning to move and create the vacuum that pulls more air into its place. Soon there is a small breeze blowing. I’ve been working on getting more control and power over it. As far as I know, there is no other person on this planet who has these strange abilities. And no one, not even my little sister Kimi, knows that I posses them. I don’t know if she would believe me. And others would take me and lock me up and study me like some strange and exotic creature they don’t understand. And they would take me away from Kimi, leaving her alone. We’re orphans. Alone, besides each other. And I will never do anything to leave her alone and unprotected. As long as I’m there, she’s safe. But she can be a handful. She’s often oblivious to any kind of danger, and she’s very bold and independent. And she’s kind of snarky and sarcastic, which doesn’t always endear her to the people in charge of her. Especially the government workers. For some reason, they’ve hung around us our whole lives. Like they were waiting for something to happen. And they aren’t the typical orphan workers. They look rather out of place. I’ve seen a couple packing guns. I wonder… No. They couldn’t know what I can do. I’ve never done it anywhere near anyone, or left any strange markings from when I’ve explored what I can do. When these strange “abilities” began appearing, I realized that now, instead of being a helpless orphan, I could do anything! And best of all, I wouldn’t have to worry about not being able to protect Kimi anymore. It’s strange, though I’m seventeen, and Kimi’s almost fifteen, we’ve never been separated or put in foster homes. Never adopted. No one has even so much as mentioned it. Almost as if they don’t want us to leave the system, where they can keep an eye on us. I’m probably just being paranoid, but that is exactly how it feels. As if we’re being kept in a disguised prison. Well, I could imagine nicer disguises, but at least we’re together.
Mar 3, 2011
hey guys. i'm thinking about revamping my book, as i seem to have written myself into a hole. hopefully i'll be posting the new chapters soon. till then, enjoy life and don't eat too many m'n'ms. what am i saying?!? you can never eat too many m'n'ms!
Feb 14, 2011
Feb 13, 2011
June 20, 2011
So… some major things have happened, and I’m not all sure what they are. They have to do with me and, well, fire. I almost don’t want to even write it down, because it will make it so concrete. Oh well. Here we go.
Let’s start with last week. Nothing unexplainable or out of the ordinary had happened since the Jake/hair fiasco. Except that he keeps looking at me strangely. But at least he hasn’t been bothering me. Or anyone for that matter. Major plus! Getting on with it. When I got home from school last week, Jake suddenly pulls me into a room. I’m starting to glare at him and get ready to fight my way out of this, when he says, “Calm down! I’m not going to beat you up. I… am asking to talk with you privately. And since you disappear sometimes after school, I figured you had a place. I promise I’ll be good. Besides you could probably take me in a fight if it came down to it.” He said all that at light speed while I was mentally going through all the body’s more fragile and painful points that I could break on him. But what he said made me pause and think, what the hey. So after swearing him to secrecy, I took him up to the attic. Of course I didn’t let him in until I had hidden this journal. After he came in he looked around a little bit and then settled down in one of the chairs I had sort of fixed with some duct tape.
“Nice place,” he quipped. At that I made a face that I hoped looked superior and annoyed. He got the message. What he said then definitely had a shock factor; I don’t remember the exact words, so here’s basically what he said. “So I don’t know what happened last month when my hair burst into flames, or what you know about it, but I’ve been thinking. And I have some questions. Do you know what happened?” I decided since he was being frank with me I would be back. And maybe just a touch facetious.
“Oh you mean when you tried to kiss me?” I said with a bit of an innocent flutter of my eyes.
“Yeah that,” He sighed. “I’m sorry.” That last part I almost didn’t catch, but I did. I was a tad shocked at that one, so I decided to just level with him and stop the attitude, though it was well deserved.
“Well really, I have no idea. But I think… I might have made it happen. I don’t know how, and it freaked me out.” Darn. That came out a lot faster and weaker than I wanted it to. Oh well.
“You sure didn’t seem freaked out to me,” Jake muttered.
“I’m good at hiding it. But you want to know something really weird?” and I explained what happened in January, you know when i suddenly became my own personal heater? And that ever since my body temperature was several degrees higher than doctors say it should be, but I’m not sick. Oh, and near the beginning of it I saw flames where there weren’t any. That and I’m somehow extremely aware of almost any heat. His eyes narrowed a bit and I could tell he couldn’t tell if I was messing with him or not. So I pulled out the thermometer I had snuck up there shortly after that happened. I stuck it in my mouth and showed it to him. He looked a bit surprised.
“It’s not supposed to say 105 if your not REALLY sick,” he said slowly. I chuckled a bit wryly. Then I put on a blindfold, stuffed my ears with with cotton balls, and told him to move around the room as silently as possible and I would call out where he was in the room. Then I turned on the radio I had in there just to prove to him that I wouldn’t be able to hear him. He moved around for a couple minutes before he came over and took the blindfold off.
“I believe you, but while you’ve been proving it too me I’ve had an idea,” he looked a little nervous.
“What?” I said brilliantly.
“When you set my hair on fire, did you think about it? I mean consciously?”
“Well it wasn’t like a whole sentence. You know, just like a regular thought I guess. Almost just a picture and a half a wish. If I had a choice of setting someone’s hair on fire and punching the daylights out of ‘em, I would generally go for the last one. More pain inflicted.”
“Yeah I could’ve guessed. Though the hair on fire worked pretty well on me.” I could swear there was a bit humor in his eyes when he said that. Maybe he is human after all! “What I’m thinking is, maybe you did it with you mind. Have you tried doing it again?” Hmm… yes I’ve been going around setting people’s hair on fire just for fun. I wish I’d thought to say that, but at the time all I managed was a dumb look and a weak no. I had just spent a month trying to avoid even remembering it happened, after all. Ah well, so much for the stinging remarks. Everything else left my mind except this scary thought: What if I can do it again? I must have gotten this strange look on my face, because he immediately pulled out a paper towel and said, “Try this, not my hair this time.” I laughed a bit too nervously for my pride, but I ignored it and put the paper towel on the floor. I took a couple seconds to calm my mind down (yeah right!), Took a deep breath, and thought, “Ok paper towel, light on fire!” …
Nothing happened. Jake asked if I had tried yet. “No, I’m just sitting here staring at a paper towel on the floor because I’m bored,” I said, my voice dripping in sarcasm.
“Ok. Don’t bite my head off. Just try again,” he said calmly.
“You know the definition of insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting a different result?” I was stalling. I was starting to hope he might actually be right and I wasn’t dying or losing my mind, and I didn’t want that shot down just yet.
“Yeah that’s great. Try again.” He wasn’t buying it. I could try again. If it didn’t work, it didn’t work. Oh well, I’m not superman. So I looked at the poor paper towel lying helpless on the floor, and pictured it slowly catching on fire, spreading from one corner all over it until it was reduced to a pile of ashes. I was concentrating on that image so hard that it took a few seconds for my brain to register Jake tapping my arm. When I looked at him, he was looking a bit pale, but really excited.
“It worked! You burned it to ash. Look!” he was almost yelling. I looked, and it was a pile of ashes. The picture I had thought was in my head must have been the real thing. I hadn’t closed my eyes. And there was the sad little heap of ash. Oh gosh. I can light things on fire with my mind! I think I might have sat down a little abruptly.
That was exactly a week ago today. Since then we’ve been coming up here and depleting the House’s supply of burn-able material. We did a whole roll of paper towels at once, a piece of wood I found on the bottom of a broom closet left there from the renovation, pieces of paper. It’s really easy for me to do it now, ‘cause I know exactly how to do it. I just see it in my head, and it happens simultaneously in real life. I still don’t understand why I can do it, but I’m not as freaked out by it. On the other hand, Jake is actually being civil to people. Nice even. Sean asked me if I had beat him up and that’s why he’s being nice, and I just answered a vaguely. Dana seems less tense now too. I think I’m gonna tell them about it tomorrow. I feel bad about not telling them sooner, I just didn’t want them to think I was crazy. I care a lot more about what they think of me than I do about Jake, but I still wish I could have told them first. Oh well. I’ll tell them tomorrow after school. And we can make the attic our little place of escape. It’ll be a kind of present to make up for not telling them sooner. I really hope Sean and Dana don’t get freaked out and scared of me or something. I know that sounds ridiculous but I can’t help being nervous. Well, it’s really late now and tomorrow’s a school day so I have to sneak back down to bed. Yikes.
June 21, 2011
So, I forgot that today was my birthday. Wow. Never done that before. I guess I was rather preoccupied with the whole, I CAN MAKE THINGS BURST INTO FLAMES WITH MY MIND thing. Which I suppose it what made it really easy for Dana to plan and carry out a surprise birthday party for me. Usually I’m suspecting something, so I either know what’s coming before it does, or I at least know that something’s being planned. This time, I was completely caught off guard.
When I got home from school, Dana said she had wanted to tell me something important. She said the living room was a good place because, “I didn’t see anyone in there when I walked by it.” Completely true of course (Dana never lies. I mean never. It’s one of the things I like best about her.), But she was checking to make sure that I wouldn’t see any of the people hiding!I was rather caught up in how she and Sean would react when I told them that I not only had the craziest secret ability ever, but that Jake had known before them. Not that I’d really had a choice in the matter. So of course I followed her into the living room not even remotely suspecting that she had managed to hide every body behind very little furniture. An amazing feat by the way. Still not sure how she did that. When we were in the middle of the room, she turned around and said rather solemnly, “So I just wanted to tell you… SURPRISE!!!!!!!!” And everybody jumped out and yelled Happy Birthday! I probably jumped ten feet in the air and almost bolted from the room. I mean, there was nobody in the room, and in about 0.00005 seconds there was almost no wiggle room in there at all. Dana was pretty much jumping up and down in triumph while Sean picked me up in a bear hug from behind and a cake was carried in all lit up with fifteen candles. It was a great surprise. But after I blew out the candles, they only brought out one present. I mean, I’m not really one to demand tons of presents, but all this work and only one present? Oh well. I opened it as fast as I could and nearly fell out of my seat. It was one of those really expensive (because they’re beautiful and amazing!) Swim suits from a department store! My jaw probably dropped to my chest, because Sean said, “She says thank you, everybody!” I looked up at him quizzically, still speechless, of course. He leaned down and whispered amid the noise that he had taken up a collection of a dollar from anybody who wanted to help, but he and Dana had been saving up for a while to put on the party and get the present. “We know how much you love to swim, so we thought it would be perfect.” I think I just jumped on him and wrestled him to the ground and then nearly squished Dana with the tightest hug I could.
We cut the cake and everybody had a great time. There was no catastrophe or even a broken limb. It was amazing actually, considering how many kids (and staff, of course) were crammed into that room. Even Jake had shown up, much to Sean and Dana’s great surprise, and even a little of my own. He even looked almost happy. Speaking of him…
After the party I decided that I would go ahead and tell Sean and Dana about the weird fire thing today. Well, I guess now that would be yesterday. It’s something like three in the morning now. As we were just about done cleaning up (another shocker: Jake helped! Maybe he was just hanging around to be there when I told them about the scary cool new powers I have.), I told them that now I had a surprise for them. I took them up to the attic door, which is located in the roof of the broom/cleaning supplies closet, so they were a little confused at first. Hee-hee. Jake followed. Once we were all inside the closet, I shut the door. Thankfully it was a walk-in closet so I had room to open the attic door without squishing anybody. I climbed up and made sure everything was in place and then called down for them to climb up. As she was climbing up Dana asked if there was a floor. “Uh, yeah, there’s a floor all right.” At this point I was pretty excited/nervous to see what they’re reactions would be. Once they were both up the ladder, I switched on the light.
They gave me very satisfying oohs and aahs. I had been working on making it clean and fun for the past two days. I had repaired the furniture as well I could with the little know-how I had. And Jake. For some reason he’s been acting pretty decently lately. Maybe it’s because I gained his respect when I stood up to him that day. Who knows. Back to the attic. We had also swept and scrubbed the floors and found out that it was a nice wood floor. I had snuck up my reading lamp a while ago so I could write in my journal after dark. And I had used what little change I had leftover from Sean’s birthday party to buy some cheap but nice candles at the dollar store and snuck them up when the staff weren’t looking. (No candles or things that used open flames were allowed in the House. Then I used a really long broom to wipe away the cobwebs from the ceiling. It helps that the door leads right to the cleaning closet. I didn’t have to ask the staff for stuff and have to explain why I needed them. They probably wouldn’t let us back up here. But we’re not doing anything dangerous or anything. Well, except for the lighting things on fire with my mind, but you know. And I really wanted a place where I could tell them without having to worry about anyone else overhearing. And we can get away from the constant crowd. So after I had made sure that they noticed and appreciated all our hard work, I got down to the big secret. I was only majorly nervous.
“So this is actually only a small part of the secret I wanted to tell you guys.” I said rather slowly.
“Please tell me you and Jake aren’t dating!” Dana burst out, surprising not only everybody else but also herself. When I looked at her like she was crazy, she said, “Well I noticed you were both disappearing at the same time for the last week and I was thinking about following you but I was scared that I would find out that it was true, or you would be so mad at me that you wouldn’t talk to me again. So I didn’t and please just say yes or no. I’ll be fine with it if you are. Please just tell me!” i don’t think she’s ever said so much so fast at one time. I was a little shocked by the idea, but then I haven’t been doing to well keeping her informed.
“Wow, did you just say all that in one breath? Pretty impressive.” Jake got that out and just got glared at. “What? I was just curious.” More glares. “Ok I’m sorry. Continue.”
I turned to Dana. “No, we are not dating and probably never will, so you can stop worrying now.” And I gave her hand a little pat to calm her down for added measure. At this point I could swear Sean chuckled a bit under his breath, but when I glanced at him he seemed very curious but no hint of laughter. He did ask what the heck was going on, so I launched into what was probably a very confusing and supersonic speed explanation. At the end they were still kind of confused so I summed it up for them. “I can make things burst into flame with my mind.” Five second pause for laughter… Thankfully, they didn’t laugh. In fact, while Dana still looked confused, Sean looked really pale. Either he believed me and was scared, or he didn’t and was scared I had lost my mind and was going to get locked up in an asylum. Or maybe he was just shocked and hadn’t been out in the sun in a while. A girl can be hopeful.
After about ten seconds passed and they still hadn’t said anything I figured they were having trouble believing me. I would have trouble believing me. I mean, someone says “I can make things burst into flame with my mind!” Would you believe them? Nope. They would be packed off to the nuthouse. At least Sean and Dana were trying to believe me. Thinking ahead, I had already figured it would require some demonstration. I brought out a piece of paper, showed them both sides of the paper and my hands, just like a magician would (except his really are tricks). Then I concentrated, and almost immediately, it was a covered with flames. Dana gasped and backed up a step, but Sean didn’t even react. I guessed he needed more proof to convince him, so I brought out a small log I had swiped from the stash for the fireplace downstairs. I set in the middle of the floor and backed away. I imagined it fully engulfed in flame and it obliged. Then the fire going completely out in a second and it again obeyed. Then I pictured a tiny line of white-hot flame burning into the log, “Now do you believe me?” I extinguished the fire and immediately picked it up (i had figured out how to suck the heat right out of a fire to put it out.), And said, “Now look at the floor. No burn marks at all, and its a wood floor. A normal fire would at least have left a scorch mark.” Then getting nervous that they still hadn’t said anything I blurted out, “Jake found out I could do this accidentally so he bugged me to try it again so we’ve been coming up here figuring out what I really could do and I got nervous about what you guys would think so I waited to tell you until I could be sure to show you in a way that you wouldn’t doubt and I decided I was ready two days ago that I was ready and spent all this time getting ready and cleaning and don’t be mad that I didn’t tell you sooner and please don’t get freaked out!” Awkward pause while I panted for breath. If I hadn’t been so nervous I would have laughed at their faces. I’m pretty sure they couldn’t make those faces again if they tried. I looked at Dana to see if I could tell what she was thinking, and she finally caught my glance. It seemed to shake her out of her thoughts because she finally said something.
“Whoa.” Dana slowly breathed. She never was much for long speeches. She usually left that to me.
“I know this is hard to swallow, believe me it’s sometimes still hard for me, and I’m the one doing it. But do you believe me?” I said, the words coming out sounding a bit more desperate than i wanted.
“I believe you, Kimi.” Sean finally broke his silence to say. I think he realized I couldn’t stand much longer without an answer. I might have exploded, actually. When he finally said that I think I might have bruised him a little with my hug.
“I do too. I’ve just never seen anything like that except on TV, so I was a little shocked at first, that’s all,” said the quiet Dana. Thank God! They didn’t think I had lost my marbles. We talked for probably four more hours, them asking tons of questions and then listening while I explained how I did it and all the stuff back to January. Jake didn’t say much when I got to the whole, lighting his hair on fire part, but I made sure Sean knew he had apologized and been quite respectful ever since, but I could still tell that though he controlled his face pretty well, Sean was still seething inside. I hoped he would only beat Jake up a tiny bit. Sean was a bit protective of girls. Some people call that a hero complex, but I personally much prefer it to guys being jerks and not respecting them at all. When we all decided to call it a night and meet back here again after school tomorrow, I stopped Sean before he went down the stairs and asked him to go easy on Jake. I told him that I suspected he had been treated pretty poorly wherever he had been before here, and as soon as I had knocked a little sense in him he had been relatively nice. Sean just kind of grunted. I took that to mean that he wouldn’t kill the guy. I guess I’ll know tomorrow.
Good gravy it’s late! It’s almost time to get up for the bus. Yikes! More tomorrow.
Jan. 23, 2011
Well, I was a zombie yesterday after basically staying up all night. I think I might have gotten about an hour of sleep that night. When I conked out in fourth period, Jake was nice and let me sleep until the teacher started walking around the classroom. Then he was brilliant and woke me up by poking me. Nearly fell out of my desk. Thankfully I had knocked my pencil of the desk so I covered by quickly bending over and picking it up before the teacher got suspicious. Either that or the teacher was just being nice. I didn’t really care. I don’t do well without at least five hours of sleep. I’m just glad I made it through the day without crashing again. Or drooling on somebody. That is always the most embarrassing thing ever.
Though saliva is a fascinating topic, I will force myself to move on (Sarcasm there, in case you were freaking out). So after school we all went up to the attic, and I looked Jake over, but he didn’t seem to be sore or have any visible bruises. Nice to know that Sean didn’t hurt him. We talked for a little bit before I fell asleep again. This time I was sleeping like a rock. I didn’t even hear them sneak downstairs to get some ice water three hours later. I did wake up when the poured it down my back. You can imagine I was a bit peeved. I flew off the couch and dove on them. We had a nice wrestling match. We all ended up in a heaving and giggling pile on the floor, with no one an obvious winner. I was standing up to go change into some dry clothes, when we were all startled with this huge BANG!!! Instinctively, I tried to defend myself, but the only thing that managed to run through my brain was one thought: Fire! It was then that I discovered another thing I could do with fire. While the others scrambled up and tried to figure out where the sound had come from, I looked down at my hands. They were on fire!
After freaking out for half a second (trying to quote my brain would look something like this: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!), I realized that I wasn’t on fire, I was holding the fire in my palms. I had, without trying to, discovered how to make fire out of air. Literally. I had used the small amounts of flammable gasses that are in the air to create fireballs in my hands. You know the stuff that’s usually harmless and even the stuff that makes air breathable, like oxygen? Well, I had super-heated a tiny part of the air until it burst into flames. All in a split second. Let me tell you, this is so much cooler than being able to burn one little piece of paper!
When I finally looked up, I realized that Dana, Sean, and Jake were all staring at me with this amazed/blank look on their faces. I started giggling. I still wish I’d had a camera to capture the looks on their faces. Great moment. I could hardly stop for breath, let alone answer the sudden barrage of questions coming from three directions. When I had calmed myself down enough to breathe, I told them what I had figured out the moment before. By the way, the fire had gone out as soon as I had looked up at them. So of course they wanted to see if it was a one time thing or if I could do it again. I did too, but I had no idea how to do it again, or even exactly how I had done it the first time. But, as curiosity goes, I’m definitely the cat. So I told them to stand back and tried to remember the feelings and thoughts that had run through my head the last time. I looked down at my hands. No luck. I tried again. Same outcome. Nada.
Then Jake proved that he did think sometimes by suggesting that I just picture the air right by my hands heating up so hot it caught on fire. Well, I thought, why not? So I tried it. Hee-hee. Pooouf! Two huge flames went up from my palms about three feet high and nearly caught the ceiling fan (that didn’t actually work) on fire. After a few more volatile tries I was able to subdue it to just a small handful of fire. I was so excited that for another hour I forgot completely how tired I was. I just kept starting and putting put the fireballs. And I was able to get them to change heat and size independently. So amazing! After a while I was having a hard time keeping my eyelids open and decided to call it a night. I still had some homework to do before tomorrow. How ironic. I can make fire out of nothing but I still couldn’t get out of homework. Sigh.
We didn’t think about that big bang again until this afternoon. It’s Friday and we didn’t have to worry about school tomorrow, so we planned a big sleepover after everyone else had gone to sleep downstairs. We smuggled up snacks and drinks and card games right after school then all of us went to sleep really early. Jake slept in a corner a little away from the other kids in his room, so he was gonna set a quiet alarm and then come wake up the rest of us. The plan worked nicely, and at about one a.m. We were all upstairs and playing Slap-jacks. Sean was about to win again, when we were all scared spit-less at another BANG!!! I looked down at my hands; no fire balls this time. I was a bit surprised when Dana went over to the huge chimney and started poking around it.
“What are you doing?” I bravely whispered. (More sarcasm here.)
“I think the sound came from inside the chimney.” She whispered back.
“Well it’s a little late in the year for Santa Clause, and it wasn’t loud enough to be very big.” This a bit more loudly from Sean. “Maybe it was a bird. I know they like to nest in chimneys during the summer, when no one builds a fire…” That thought made us all a little braver, so we crept over to the chimney with Dana and listened.
“I think I hear something moving around.” Jake said, a bit tentatively.
“Where?” Dana said, and tried to put her ear where he was pointing, but when she leaned against the chimney, it suddenly gave way! We all jumped back expecting it to come crumbling down on us (or at least I did). After a couple seconds I realized that it had not come crumbling down on us, but that Dana had triggered some kind of revolving door built right into the chimney. It was actually pretty big. (I’m guessing it was built in so chimney cleaners could get up in there to clean it out, but had been forgotten or overlooked in the remodel.) No one had cleaned out the chimney in a very long time, judging from all the soot that was now all over the floor. By then I noticed that Dana was kneeling by the door again.
“What is it?” I asked in between coughing up a lung.
“It’s some kind of bird.” She said quietly.
“Ha! I knew it.” Sean said triumphantly, but I just looked at him and chuckled a bit as I stepped over to Dana.
“Well that’s definitely not Santa Clause.” I said when I saw the bird. It was a little thing, all gray and covered in soot like the rest of us. It looked like it was about to have a heart attack, and I wondered why it didn’t just fly away. Then Dana pointed to it’s wing. It had a stick poking out of the end of the wing nearest us, and it was dragging it a little bit. I think the stick had come from the nest it was standing on.
“Now how on earth did you get that stuck in you?” Jake asked it very quietly. “Maybe it happened a while ago, and couldn’t fly out of the chimney. That could’ve been the bangs we heard. It probably tried to get out a couple times. Maybe if we give it some food it’ll calm down a bit.” Dana scurried over to the bag of chips we had smuggled up. She came back with a small handful and started crumbling one up. She placed the crumbs near it and then pushed us back so it would have room to eat it without being scared of us. After a few seconds of eyeing us and then the chips, it darted out and snatched a piece. When we didn’t pounce on it, it tried it again. Eventually it had eaten the rest and was looking around for more. Dana quickly crumbled up the rest and sprinkled them within it’s reach. It ate those much more quickly.
It’s amazing how fascinating animals can be. We spent the next two hours sneaking around the House trying to find stuff to fix the bird’s wing. We gathered all kinds of stuff from the medical room like bandages, scissors, and tape to keep it on. We also swiped some a bottle of something that killed germs and cleaned cuts and “doesn’t burn!”; I wouldn’t have made the poor bird endure alcohol. It was already gonna be scared enough. Dana fed it some more chips, and while it was focused on that Sean grabbed it. Poor thing thought it was about to get eaten. It struggled and kicked until we had to tape up its legs to keep them out of the way. We got the stick out and carefully inspected the wing for any leftover splinters or broken bones(or as carefully as you can while the bird was trying desperately to fly away…). It looked ok other than the little hole, and it wasn’t bleeding very much, so we went ahead and poured so germ-killing liquid over the wound and bandaged it up as cleanly as possible. Just in time, Dana suggested we splint the wing so the bird would have to keep it still and it could heal. Once everything was done, we sprinkled more chips in its nest and then carefully set it down and backed away.
After cowering in a corner for a while, it got hungry again and decided it could risk eating the chips in its nest. It still acted really nervous while it could see us, so Dana put a whole bunch of chips near it and then used one of the old towels (that I had saved out of the trash last month with the idea of using up here in the attic) to cover the door. It didn’t make as many scared little chattering noises after that, so we figured it had calmed down. After a bit we heard pecking/crunchy sounds, and we decided if it was eating it was ok. We cleaned up the soot and played a couple more games of cards, and then decided to go ahead and go to sleep. We set our alarms really early and curled up to sleep. I woke up a couple hours later to check on the bird and decided now would be a good time to write everything down. We’re gonna have to wake up and sneak back down in a little bit so no one catches us out of bed, so I’m going to go back to sleep now. At least it’s Saturday and no one gets up before eight.
June 29, 2011
So I did some research online and found out that the bird is called a Chimney Swift. Really cute little things that actually like the city because of all the chimneys to nest in. All of them are gray, and they live in the eastern half of North America during the summer. That’s probably why it didn’t make noise until recently. It just got back from its winter home. It doesn’t seem as scared of us now. Dana managed to buy some seeds from the store and sneak ‘em up here. She seems to like it the most. None of us can figure out if its male or female because both have very similar colorings. So, Dana decided that we were going to name it Feng, which is used for boy or girl names. She said the name sometimes is used to mean Phoenix. Which is actually rather fitting for this bird. It kind of did rise from the ashes. And it’s wing looks like it doesn’t hurt as much so we’re hoping it’s healing the right way.
Oh, and the bird doesn’t seem to have a problem with fire randomly bursting into flame out of nowhere. Perfect for us, as we seem to be doing that a lot lately. Actually mostly just me, though yesterday there was that close call with Sean. That put an end to the whole human target practice thing. Not that I was actually aiming for Sean. He was holding a thick, folded newspaper up for me to have a target to throw fire at. Jake came up with the idea that if I could make fireballs, maybe I could throw them. So we set up Sean with the newspaper to test the theory out. Turns out I can throw them… but it burnt right through the newspaper and would have caught Sean’s shirt on fire if I hadn’t made it go out as fast as I did. Apparently it was a bit hotter than we anticipated. So we scrapped that idea until we could find a safer place outside where I wouldn’t set people or buildings on fire. Or get seen. Chuckle. We’ll be looking for someplace safe after school the next few days. We looked a little today, but me and Jake had a lot of homework due the next day in one our classes, so we called it a day. What a crazy month it’s been. I’m still having a little trouble wrapping my head around this whole thing… but it’s tons of fun! Who else can say that they can do what I can do? I’ll write more later.
Feb 6, 2011
Feb. 3, 2011
So how bout them Red Sox. Gosh I hate that phrase. I don’t even know why I wrote it. This is just a weird thing to think about, let alone write. I have a sneaking suspicion that I’m sick. As in dying. I keep feeling weird heat all through my body and sometimes even seeing heat and flames that aren’t there. And I’m always feverish. I mean, my body feels fine, but I took my own temperature when the house nurse(not really but they pretend) was out of the sick room(one of the sitting rooms for the staff that is where they keep basic first aid and stuff like thermometers). It was 104 degrees. I’m no doctor, but I’m pretty sure that’s not good. I asked one of the staff to take me to the Doctor because I felt sick, and she said no at first. Then I showed her my temperature and said I was seeing things that weren’t there and she got a little pale and quickly shoved me into the car and practically sped the whole way there. When I was there the nurses and doctors asked a whole bunch of stupid questions over and over again. I said I felt fine. No, I wasn’t seeing stuff right now. As soon as they put the stinking I.V in my arm I started cooling off. I told them that and they seemed to kind of smile and relax. They told the lady who had driven me that I was really dehydrated and to keep pumping fluids in me for the next two days. And make sure I didn’t forget to drink water again. So they released me and she drove us back to the house. She’s been tracking me down and making me drink glass after glass of water all afternoon. It’s not like I wasn’t drinking water before. I don’t even like soda. Water and juice are the only thing I drink and I drink probably four or five glasses a day. Now I’ll be stuck chugging water for the next week. My teachers are not going to believe that I need to use the bathroom THAT much. Stupid doctors. And I’m hot again. Hence, I think the doctors are stupid and I’m dying. I’ll write more tomorrow; I’ve got to go use the restroom.
Feb. 12, 2011
So I finally managed to convince the nervous lady who kept following me around with a huge glass of water that I’m fine now and I’ll remember to drink water on my own. Sheesh! Sean and Dana have been teasing me about small bladders, streams of water, dripping, and waterfalls for a week. It got old for me really fast, but they seemed to find it hilarious. Now that I’m not having to flee to the restroom every five seconds I’m a lot less grouchy. My temperature is still high. I’ve been careful not to breath on people and avoided touch as much as possible in case I really am fatally sick. It’s quite a depressing thought really. I might be dying and I can’t give my friends hugs or wrestle with them. I still feel fine, except that I’m my own personal sun. I escape up here to draw or do homework. Haven’t had much new to write about.
Maybe I’m one of those weird people who spontaneously combust. If that’s the case then I’m like a ticking time bomb. Lovely. That’s a horrible thought. Very depressing. I’m gonna stop the morbid stuff now. Maybe I’m just very, very warm blooded. Right.
March 4, 2011
Still alive. Though I have had some new symptoms. You know static electricity, and how people sometimes build it up? Like when you’re wearing socks and you touch a doorknob. Well, I can see the little arc of electricity that jumps off or to people. At first I thought there’s no way. Maybe I was imagining it. But then I put on my best static-y socks and did it to myself. Results: 1. It no longer hurt when I got shocked. I felt it, but it was more like I absorbed it than got hit with it. 2. I could definitely see it every time. I called Sean and asked if he could see it and he said no. When he asked why I just said I was curious. Then I zapped him. Chuckle. The other symptom I’ve developed is extreme heat awareness. As in I could tell you the moment the heater kicks in, or if a fire was started. Even in my sleep! I don’t wake up, but it’s there in my dreams. And I can still tell all this with my eye’s covered, my ears plugged, and my nose stuffed with cotton balls. I can… sense it. It’s beginning to freak me out a little bit. I’m gonna see if I can just ignore it. Maybe my brain is bored and is just making it all up to entertain itself. If so I wish it would have let me know. I mean come on.
March 28, 2011
Still alive. Ignoring the “symptoms” isn’t working. I’m beginning to wonder if my brain is ok. Maybe the “trauma” of being an orphan is messing me up. But I don’t feel traumatized. Hmm… I always thought psychology was a load of bunk. I shouldn’t try to analyze my own brain. I guess that I’m even thinking that means that I’m okok again and then he’d just let out some tension and look like a noodle for about ten minutes. I’m just gonna stop worrying about it and accept it. Which is going to be a bit easier now because I’m no longer “seeing” fire where it isn’t anymore. Usually the absence of hallucinations are a good thing. Ah well. I’ll write more later. Gonna be busy with a big project in school due.
April 7, 2011
Finally something else to write about! Guess what. I finally topped Sean in a prank. On April Fools no less! I’m so proud of myself. It was so simple it was brilliant. I had never known his birthday, because the stubborn mule would never tell anyone. I enlisted the help of Dana, and we went snooping in his files. (We really could have been majorly busted for this of course) Dana was on the lookout while I searched for his birthday. There was no birth certificate, but it was listed on something else in his file. Triumphant, we got out of there and I told Dana. His birthday was April 1st! No wonder he wouldn’t tell me. He knew how much fun I would have with that delectable piece of information. Maniacal laughter! So I hatched a brilliant plan. With Dana reigning me in when it became too crazy, of course. Once I came up with the idea, I talked the staff into helping me. While we were at school, they set up the biggest room at the house for a party. And one of them, with the bribe of me doing all her worst cleaning chores for the month, went to the store and bought all the trick birthday party and present stuff she could find. Muahahahahaa! When we got back I found a way to get him into the room. I had a camera ready to get the face he made. Hee hee! It was amazing. He kept getting surprised the whole party. From age old tricks of candles that won’t go out, to exploding cake. And one present was in this huge box. He unwrapped it and managed to cut through the million layers of duct tape only to open it and find another box. That went on for six boxes. He finally got down to a really small box, and it was an eraser. Then we brought out the box of high grade drawing pencils. Dana came up with that brilliant idea. The party was a great success. And that wasn’t the end. More maniacal laughter. In the middle of the night, I snuck into the boys’ room and managed to dye his hair pink without waking him up. It was perfect! The next morning I heard this kind of yelp of surprise. He took a much longer shower than usual. Giggle. It wasn’t permanent dye, but it would take a couple weeks to come out. I’ve been gloating for the last week. He shaved his head yesterday. He will never live down the pink hair if I can help it.
April 26, 2011
Sean got me for the birthday party and pink hair, but even he admitted that it didn’t top mine. I may have finally vanquished him! In other news, we have a new arrival at the house. A fifteen year old boy named Jake. He’s tall and muscular, topped with a real attitude. Even Sean can’t stand him, and he gets along with all the guys. Some of the kids have started calling him Jake the Jerk. I can’t say I blame him. Dana avoids him altogether if she can. Unfortunately for me, he’s in my grade. And most of my class periods. Deep sigh. I try to ignore him, and if it’s completely impossible I’m perfectly civil. Or at least I try. Who knows. There may be a nice guy down deep in there. Really far down there.
May 20, 2011
So, I have no idea what just happened. I’m a touch in shock at the moment. I just ran up here to try and figure out what just happened. It’s not working very well. I guess I’ll just record the facts of what happened. Ok. Here we go. So Jake has been really living up to his nickname. I’ve been trying to be nicer to him, as I’ve seen some really hurt kids come here who were just being hard to be around to protect themselves. I figured, hey, everyone deserves to be given at least one chance. And I’m stubborn enough to not give up. So I kept at it for almost a month, and he started being less of a pill. At least to me. Then I guess hormones kicked in and he started trying to flirt with me. I made it clear that I was not interested, but apparently he has a really thick head. Today he was still trying to flirt when he cornered me and tried to kiss me. Before he could, or I could even try to push him away, a thought flashed through my mind. It was something along the lines of, “Gosh it would be cool if his hair suddenly caught on fire.” Next thing I know, he’s batting at his hair trying to put it out. I had the presence of mind to keep my mouth from hanging open, and when he looked back at me, something made me say, “Try it again.” It came out very calm and with a bit of a dare in it. He kind of went pale and I could tell his mind was racing trying to come up with some understanding of what just happened. Mine was too, but I didn’t let him see that. He slinked off without saying another word, and I remembered that I needed to breath. I then got up here as fast as I could to try and think through what just happened. It didn’t work, so now I’m writing it down here. It was too much of a coincidence that I was thinking that right as it happened. And people’s hair doesn’t just go up in flames! Did I make that happen?
Same day, late at night:
So I’ve been thinking hard about it all day, and I’ve decided to put it down to an extremely well-timed freak of nature. Or maybe he mixed too many chemicals into his hair when he gelled it that morning… Ok I’m not really buying either of those options, but they make a lot more sense than my thoughts setting his hair on fire. It’s too crazy. I’m just not going to think about it.
May 21, 2011
It’s really hard not to think about it when Jake is going around with really short hair and avoiding looking in my direction. Once he bumped into me and, shocker! apologized. Sean even noticed that he’s been more subdued. Which all means I did not imagine that freaky scene. Trying desperately not to freak out.
Feb 4, 2011
Confessions of a Firebug
Not that I’m an actual bug or anything, though I suppose I could be, at least in this journal. I can write whatever I want in it. I could make myself into this normal sized bug that lives in the more frequently used fireplaces, borrowing into the ash in between fires to hibernate. It lives only in the winters, and is horribly colorful. Horribly because anything that lives in a fire must look horrific. But alas! (as my uncle used to say, I think) I am not that frightfully interesting bug. I am an orphan in one of the newer orphan homes in the city. I know, so cliché. But I probably won’t go on some otherworldly or magical adventure and find my long-lost family or some equally ridiculous plot. If I’m lucky Ill get adopted into some decent sort of family with either no kids or too many. Or Ill get shoved into the awful foster care system and get housed by horrible people who are only taking me in for the paycheck they get. Real hopeful outlook on my future, eh?
But I’m not really Miss Doom and Gloom. I was just letting you know what the probable options of my life really are so you can get any fantastical and outlandish fairy tale endings out of your head. I’m a normal orphan in a normal, dirty, everyday world. And if you’re looking for a momentary escape from the realities of your own, this is not the book to read. Although I have no idea why you would be reading my journal, and if you were I might have to pop you one. Not that I’m going to write any life changing thoughts or devastating secrets in this, but hey. Its my stuff and people are just so snoopy.
Jan 12, 2011
Oops. I forgot to date my last entry. It was Christmas of 2010, or a couple weeks ago. Nothing big happened; I just forgot that I had a journal to write in. I got it as a random Christmas present that some nice people thought to send over right before Christmas. They had bought just enough for every kid in our small house and had wrapped them and put about the age of the kid that would enjoy the present, and whether it should be given to a boy or girl. I grabbed mine out before they could hand me a stupid one. I picked it because it looked like it would be a DVD, but this was cool too. I was definitely glad it was a journal, and not a diary, because diaries are just too frilly sounding. Oh, by the way, I’m a fourteen year-old tomboy named Kimi MacAoidh. I’ll get into my strange name later. Back to my insecty theme. A couple people have branded me a firebug. That does not sound so great when you are trying to get adopted. Oh no! She’ll burn down our house in our sleep! No. I just think that fire is pretty and I like fireplaces and candles a lot. Not like I’m obsessed or anything. Or stupid for that matter. Everyone knows that fire is dangerous if you not careful and respectful of it. I’m just fascinated with how it works, the colors it has, and the shadows it throws. Sheesh! And besides, I also love water, wind and dirt. I guess they don’t see those because they aren’t dangerous. But when I get to swim, I feel like an otter. And a good strong wind makes me wish I could fly. I really enjoy growing things too. So its definitely NOT like I’m unbalanced or anything.
Anyway. They also say that I do well in school, which is a good thing I guess. I don’t cause trouble and I like to learn. My uncle taught me to read and write before kindergarten, and for as long as I can remember Ive been fascinated with languages. Not math! Ugh. I hate math. I can work most problems that you give me, but it feels like pulling teeth. So English is my favorite subject, and if people ask me for help I can usually do that.
You know how long it took me to write this by hand? An hour, give or take a couple minutes. Now its late and I’m going to be tired during school tomorrow. Yay. I guess I could try to write more in the afternoons instead of at night before I go to sleep, but its hard to find privacy when other people are awake. Hmm… maybe I could find a way out onto the roof, like other orphans do in the books Ive read. Ha! Id probably do something stupid and plunge to my death. Nix that idea. I wonder if we have an attic?
Jan. 14, 2011
So guess what. We do have an attic! Its even floored and walled and painted and everything. Not a lot of junk, but there were some pieces of ruined furniture and a boatload of dust. I sneezed for five minutes after I managed to get a couple wet rags and some Windex up here. After a cleanup its pretty nice. It just got left in the middle of the last century, thats all. Its great for hiding out and writing. Ive already finished my homework and chores for the day so no one is gonna be storming all over the house looking for me. This might be the first time Ive truly had alone time in a long time. Say, three years straight. It has gotten a bit overcrowded here at the house; probably because its nice and new and they (meaning the government or whoever is over this whole system) wanted to get as many orphans out of those old, nasty buildings. This one was built in the 90s, so its kinda old, but it got renovated recently. At least it doesn’t have that awful prison look. Its painted nice warm colors, has decent bunk beds, clean bathrooms, and some playrooms. So its nice, as far as orphanages go.
Hmm… maybe I should describe how I became an orphan. Not the prettiest story, but there are others with worse. As a baby I lived with my uncle. They’re pretty sure he was my real uncle, but who knows. I remember he was always really nice, and he liked teaching me all sorts of stuff. I’m told he raised me, and they have no idea who my parents were or if they were alive or dead. Well, he got old and sick and died when I was about seven. Been in an orphanage since then. Only two. I was moved from my first one which was old and outdated to this one about three years ago. Lets see, that was when I was eleven. Oh, by the way, my birthday is June 21, or, what has often been pointed out to me, the Summer Solstice. So my birthday is the longest day of the year and I have more birthday than anyone else. Whoopee. My birthday is nice because I get a cake and some presents and I always feel warm and happy. But in the end its just another day.
Sometimes I wish I had a family who loves me and cares for me like my uncle did. But it doesn’t last too long, because I’m happy where I am. At the orphanage there are lots of kids who come and go, but there are a few long-terms like me. Sean has been here longer than me and is a great big brother. He’s been in a couple dysfunctional foster homes, but somehow he managed to stay at the orphanage till he’s old enough to go out on his own. He’s sixteen, and counting down to eighteen. He’s good in school too, but he wants to wait about a year before he goes to college and get some experience working. Says he doesn’t want more loans to pay off than he has to. He’s smart, I guess, and listens to any advice anyone gives him and weighs it against his own common sense and the stuff he’s learned in school and online. He says when he gets out he’ll make sure I’m ok, and if he can get to a place where he can take care of me, I can move in with him if I want to. Of course that’ll be after he goes through college. We’ll see. Then there’s Dana, who was born in China and got adopted while she was still a baby. But when she was eight, her adopted parents decided that they didn’t want kids after all. At least that’s what she says. It must have been awful. She still has trust issues; she finds it hard to let anyone in. But I like her and I’m stubborn, so we’ve become pretty good friends. She’s twelve but often acts older than me, so the age difference doesn’t really matter. And I love the kids. There are always a couple here that I get along great with. I try to get them treats and play with them when I can. And there are a couple long-haul workers in the orphanage that have been here for years and have a heart of gold. These people are my family and I love them. And I’m happy. Mostly.
Jan. 24, 2011
So a couple things have happened. Actually not really. I’ve been really bored. And besides brag about how smart I am, I’m so tired of school I really don’t want to spend my alone time writing about. So, I’m going to talk more about myself. Narcissism at its best. Woot. Perhaps I should mention I have a bad habit of being sarcastic. At least that’s what I’m told. I think it’s often more effective than stating the obvious. And some people just fail to pick up on the whole sarcasm thing, so I can kind of giggle on the inside. Heehee. Ahem… Why did I just write “ahem?” I don’t know. I guess I’m bored. ok. Back to being narcissistic.
Mm… let’s see, based on what I remember my uncle telling me, I’m of Scottish decent, though I have enough Native American in me to keep me from looking like the typical plaster white skin and freckles that pops into mind when you mention Scottish. Maybe that’s where I get my stubbornness. Both ethnic groups were pretty stubborn. And fought a lot. And held century old grudges. Ah well, maybe I’m not exactly like my ancestors. Maybe I am. Who knows. Native American’s loved the elements, and were brave and patient. Highlanders could scratch out a living from nothing. Rabbit-trailing now. Anyway. Kimi is Algonquin for “secret,” and MacAoidh, pronounced mac-OW-ood, is my Dad’s last name. It is actually straight up Gaelic, and it means “son of Aoidh.” Aoidh is a Celtic word for god meaning “fire.” So my name is literally “Secret Fire.” It’s actually pretty cool. I researched it a little while back when we were supposed to write a paper on our cultural history. Stupid assignment if you ask me when a good bit of your class are ORPHANS. Brilliant teachers, I have.
Moving on. Ok… well, I call myself a tomboy mainly because I’m not like most of the girls I’ve met. Maybe I’ve not had a very wide sampling, but the whole boys/magazines/make-up/clothes/complain about dirt thing never really appealed to me. In my mind I chuckle a bit watching them and just go on. Really, there is more to life! So I just slip in the word tomboy in conversation shortly after meeting people and if some weird or strange behavior pops out they can just say, “Right, tomboy,” and don’t think much more about it. But I don’t want to be a boy. I’m perfectly comfortable being a girl; I’ll probably even get married. It still sometimes irks me that guys are just naturally stronger (physically only, mind you) than girls, but I can often out smart ‘em, so I feel a little better. The only guy I could never completely outsmart is Sean. We can go head to head for hours and not prove either way which of us was craftier. Never stopped us from trying though. Pranks are so much fun. We have to be careful not to get caught, (they’re not allowed) but that just makes it more of a challenge. And of course we wouldn’t do anything that would get each other hurt. There was one where I gave Sean a sketchbook that I had been saving for for almost six months. It was made with pages that were saturated with a chemical that absorbed ink, (his favorite drawing tool is a pen) so every time he drew a picture, the next day it had disappeared. He finally suspected something was up; I crowed over that one constantly for two days. Then I realized the more I gloated the more he would want to make his comeback even more spectacular. It was, and it will not be mentioned in this journal. Let’s just say he has crowing rights for now, as I have yet to think of one to top it. Someday…
Jan. 25, 2011
Very bored today. Got tons of homework. Love writing in incomplete sentences because I know it would drive my English teacher up the wall. Gonna stop avoiding homework now. Oh wait! Something did happen today. It was really strange. I was freezing and miserable in Algebra today, along with everyone else in the building. The heater had gone out a couple of periods before. So I was sitting there thinking how nice it would be if we could just have a fire inside us that we could just turn on when we needed, when I felt an electrical shock, and was suddenly warm all over. I jumped a little and looked around, and everyone was still staring at the teacher. Well, that proved my hair wasn’t on fire at least. I looked around again and noticed that everyone else was still shivering and miserable, while I was considering taking off my coat. Weird right? The warmth seemed to spread from my chest out, like the feeling you get when you eat a warm soup, only it wasn’t coming from my stomach. I haven’t been cold since. I didn’t tell anyone because they would just think I was making it up for attention. As if I wanted attention from school. Ugh. As much as I hate it, I’m going to have to really borrow into my algebra homework if I’m gonna get it done before tomorrow.
Well, my first attempt at writing was an utter failure. The first couple pages went as I wanted them too, but it soon deteriorated. My writing became stilted, over detailed, and not expressive of what I wanted. I consulted my writer father, who advised me that I had tried to write about something too important to me my first time. So I began anew. And this time just to have fun. I had no idea what I was going to write, but I started anyway. What came out surprised me. And the longer I wrote, the more the characters and story took on their own life. It was exhilarating.
It came out rather quirky and just a tad sarcastic. It’s science fiction, not mystical or magical. There are no ghosts or, God forbid, vampires. Just a few kids taking on the evils of their world. I entertained myself, and here’s hoping it entertains you. I’ll be posting a chapter a week. Please visit and comment!